The Lesson I Learned from Ilnaz: How I Traveled Without a Calendar

It was 10:20 PM. Ilnaz packed her bag without once looking inside to see what she was putting in. I, on the other hand, had ironed and layered my clothes the night before. That is our difference. She travels with her Scorpio 9:20 PM; I travel with my Virgo 6:15 AM. And yet, that very trip showed me that frameworks can sometimes be prisons.

Clinical psychologists believe that spontaneous behavior, as long as it is not mistaken for impulsive decision-making that is harmful, can be beneficial for mental health. They say it helps the brain stay flexible and allows us to adapt quickly to circumstances. In another study, women who took unplanned trips not only developed problem-solving skills and emotional resilience during the journey, but these abilities also turned into psychological resources after their return, helping them manage stress and make decisions in daily life. Most importantly, the experience moved them from a need to control everything toward an acceptance of the uncontrollable.

Ilnaz, however, does not read these theories. She lives them instinctively. She goes from the smell of burnt bread to the philosophy of death in a single minute, so what expectation could one have of her trip planning? But I learned from her that “being unplanned” can be a conscious choice, not a flaw. A 2024 study showed that travel without prior planning has multidimensional values: physiological, psychological, and cognitive. In other words, going unplanned is not a retreat; it is a different mind for seeing the world.

Our trip to an unknown destination, with no hotel reservation and no calendar, was exactly that. Ilnaz would say, “We will find the destination on the way,” and with all my Virgo being, I wanted to say, “That is foolish.” But honestly, it turned out to be the most foolish thing I have ever done — and the best.

The practical takeaway? If you are a planner, just once, only once, travel without a calendar. You do not need a destination. You do not need a hotel. Just take a small bag and go. Psychologists say this practice “creates a positive ‘I can’ attitude and reminds you of the infinite possibilities that exist in the world.” And truly, that night, sitting in a roadside guesthouse with Ilnaz, drinking tea, I understood that she had been right all along.

Of course, I must admit: that very night, in my own mind, I drafted a seven-page contingency plan for emergencies. But I did not tell anyone.